I would treat it as a huge personal favour if you take this knock back as less of a dismissal and as more of a complete denial of any ability, style or wit you may claim to possess. I have read many things in the past seventeen years, no single piece has offended me more than the foul trot you have wedged through my letterbox and now stains the dignity of my desk. It shall need to be burned. And as for the novel? I took each hated page and having first dipped it in foulness, pasted their putrid wickedness over the walls of an abattoir, before stuffing the building with gasoline and igniting it with a flaming colostomy bag.